From Nothing to Everything!

As you all probably know, school started yesterday. Unlike the previous semesters, this semester we went straight to clinical duty on the first day. It really wasn't anything. It was orientation for the most part. But today, wow wow wow! Haha, we actually did so much!

Let's see, this semester I'm assigned to a long-term facility. No, this hospital doesn't have an emergency room. The patients in this hospital have been here for years and practically live here. It's a very old hospital, and it gives me the creeps. It kind of reminds me of the hospitals in the Philippines.

My professor? Well, aside from being a nurse he is actually an attorney. He's so particular about grammar and proper word usage. Earlier, he cut off my groupmate when she said she was nauseous. As opposed to being nauseated. He has 7 degrees under his belt, so I guess he really just loves studying. He is good anyway. He's not the professor who's always watching you. I haven't actually encountered him on the floor. He just simply lets us run loose.

As for the unit we go to, it's a chronic respiratory unit. Everyone is hooked up to a mechanical ventilator. Almost everyone is fed through a feeding tube, pees through a catheter, and has colostomy bags attached. Oh, and almost everyone is well... To put it bluntly, unconscious and/or brain dead.

Well today, we didn't get our specific patient assignments. We were tasked to follow what they call a Med Surg Technician in the unit. Very similar to Patient Care Associates, Certified Nurses' Aides, etc. They have way too many names for this! I worked with one kind lady and cleaned up 5 patients.

Now I've done patient care on patients, but after seeing the first patient.. I just knew all those I washed in the past were EASY patients! I open the sheets and I see the patient fully contracted in a fetal position. It was a struggle just getting his gown out without pulling out any of his tubes. And dear God, the smell was nerve-wracking even with the mask on. I usually have high tolerance for this, but.. Ah! It was just different. I told myself I shouldn't have eaten breakfast that morning. And then we washed and washed away. All those bed bath procedures in the book and in the videos just flew right out of the window! Washing this patient was totally different. Totally different from the books!!

And then the ventilator starts beeping and everything in the patient's face turns red and round and/or open. We oxygenated. We suctioned. Over and over. And there he's okay. But my God, I cannot for the life of me forget the face of the patient as if wanting to strangle me by my hair to please suction his trach and give him air. It was very.. scary.

We washed some more. We turned him and what I saw were pressure ulcers so bad. I will not even attempt to describe what I saw (and smelled) to make my point, because wow. It was just that bad. At the end of that morning, I would think to myself.. Shet, I've seen more pressure ulcers today than in my 3 previous semesters in nursing school!

And we changed and cleaned everything. His trach tube, inner cannula, colostomy bag, Texas condom catheter, and feeding bag. And then we changed the sheets, strapped him on to a new diaper, turned him (with much difficulty, I must say). We positioned him properly, put up the side rails, cleaned up our trash, turned off his light, took out our gloves, and went out.

And we did this on 4 more patients.

In the middle of everything, I just wanted to cry. I could only remember thinking, "What if this was Dad or Mom or someone close to me?" These people were staying here forever, really. They're not getting any better. They're all just well, waiting for death. Of the 5 patients I cleaned up today, only 1 actually had family pictures stuck on his bedside. All the others had nothing. There's nothing worse than being sick and having no one with you. Really. And all I could really remember thinking was, "My God, I have to clean him well. I have to put on the diaper properly. And straighten the sheets beautifully. This was all I could give him.. At least give him his dignity, even though he's dying."

I tell you, you'll definitely look at life differently when you come face to face with these patients. It's something I can't even describe.

This semester's clinical will be so blessed. I cannot wait.